My journey to becoming a single mom by choice
I haven’t shared this personal story yet with my community, but as I'm in the midst of writing my book, I thought it was important to share.
As we all know, life has a way of surprising us, leading us down unexpected paths that challenge our view on life, family, and love. For me, that journey began with the painful end of a nine-year relationship with my university sweetheart. It's a journey filled with heartbreak, self-discovery, and ultimately, empowerment – a turning point that led me to the pivotal moment when the idea of contemplating single mom by choice first entered my consciousness, a path I never thought I'd consider.
The Journey
I met my ex during my university years, and from the moment we connected, I believed he was the one I'd spend my life with. Our relationship endured the trials of long-distance, while I lived abroad for my masters and then later again for several years living in China. But despite our deep connection, his Indian parents did not approve of our relationship, and it instantly came to an end when he said, "I don’t know what to do."
Three months later, he was engaged to a woman of his parents choosing and married that same year at the same time and place we were planning to have our wedding. Needless to say, I was gutted. That he could move on so quickly and that he just continued on with our plans, just with someone else.
Heartbreak and Contemplation
The breakup was an incredibly tough period filled with heartache and introspection. In processing the pain, I struggled with profound questions about my future.
When will I find someone else to share my life with?
When would I become a mother?
What if I don’t find someone?
In the aftermath of heartbreak, I struggled with loneliness and uncertainty. But within that darkness, a seed of possibility began to grow. I always had it in the back of my head, that if I don't find a partner, that I wouldn't settle just to have kids. I grew up in a family where my parents were arranged, and it is not an environment I want to raise my children in. So that meant considering if I should become a single mom by choice? It was a crazy thought at the time because it was one that challenged societal norms and cultural expectations.It took me several years of contemplation, wrapping my head around the idea of embarking on this journey solo, all while keeping a close eye on my biological clock.
The Decision
I attempted to date after the breakup, but I never stumbled upon someone to share my life with. So, at the age of 35, I found myself at a crossroads. I began exploring options to extend my window of opportunity to find a partner. When those efforts hit a dead end, I faced a crucial decision: Do I become a single mom by choice? It was a real question that demanded real consideration. Or, do I wait to find someone and risk my chance at having my own child?
My personal journey has equipped me with a unique perspective and empathy that guides my work as a coach. Through coaching, resources, and shared experiences, I empower women to embrace their desires, confront their fears, and take control of their motherhood journey.
My path to considering single mom by choice has been marked by heartbreak, resilience, and ultimately, empowerment. In embracing the possibility of a non-traditional family, I've discovered strength I never knew I possessed. And as I walk alongside others on similar paths, I'm reminded that motherhood is not defined by circumstance, but by the courage to choose our own destiny.
- Reema
As you embark on this journey, I invite you to explore the depth of support I offer through my Choice Mom coaching services. With my extensive coaching experience and firsthand understanding of the challenges you're facing, I'm here to guide you every step of the way.
Whether you're seeking clarity in your decision-making process, need guidance in navigating the complexities of becoming a single mother by choice, or simply wish to feel empowered and supported, I offer personalized coaching to meet your needs.
Ready to take the next step? Book a free 30min consultation to discuss if coaching is right for you.
Let's explore how we can work together to ensure your path to single motherhood is filled with confidence, clarity, and unwavering support. You can also connect with me on Instagram to learn more about my journey, coaching insights, and valuable resources.
